Post by jomariem on Jul 24, 2011 0:08:19 GMT -5
I've been working on a query letter for my new YA novel, and I'm kind of stuck on it. I've been confused by all the sample queries I've been reading, and I don't know exactly what to include or to leave out. If I could get some help with it, I would really appreciate it.
Bascially, my storyline is this. The title is called "Silver: the Story of an Orca". It is about a young orca whale who gets captured by humans, goes through a variety of experiences while in captivity -- some good, some very horrific -- and then is later released into the ocean to find her family. Kind of a Free Willy thing, but is much more realistic and is not intended to be an anti-captivity novel. The focus is on the whale and how she endures some nightmarish situations without losing hope, until she can be reunited with her loved ones again.
Anyway, this is my query, what I've gotten so far. Please read and comment:
Do you enjoy reading good stories about animals, and in particular, whales and dolphins? If so, I would like to tell you about the new novel that I am proposing. My story, called Silver: The Story of an Orca, is told through the eyes of a spirited young orca whale, who begins her life with a close-knit family in the Pacific Northwest. Silver’s early days are carefree and happy, playing with her two young cousins, exploring the ocean world all around her, and basking in the love of her family members. One day, the family travels to a place called Salmon Cove -- a place where Silver’s life will soon change forever.
At first, Salmon Cove is a very delightful place, where Silver and her cousins find new playmates among the other families that are socializing there, and dining on all the delicious salmon that they can eat. But the next morning, humans -- strange creatures that Silver has seen before but has never had a reason to fear -- trap all the orcas in the cove with their nets and boats. The youngsters are snagged one by one, and separated from the adults -- and then eventually from each other.
Silver soon finds herself all alone, held captive in a sling on board a boat, heading to an unknown destination. Throughout the next few years, she will experience a variety of circumstances while under the care of man -- a place where she is well-treated by both her orca tank mates and the humans caring for her; a tank where an aggressive older female bullies and harasses her, and nearly kills her one day; a solitary existence in a dimly lit indoor warehouse pool; life in a tiny, too-warm pool in Mexico with an abusive owner, and only a cheerful bottlenose dolphin for company, and a nightmarish existence in Central America as part of a traveling circus. Silver’s health and her spirits fail her during this bleak time, and when she grows too sick and too weak to perform, her owner abandons her on a beach in the tropics.
But then, some kindly souls rescue her and nurse her back to health. When Silver recovers her strength, she soon realizes that she has a choice to make. Should she try to swim away and find her family, since she is now free to do that if she wishes? Or should she stay with the humans that she has now bonded with, and trusts completely, since she is terrified of trying to make it on her own in a vast, alien sea? Whatever she decides, it will change her life forever. . .
Silver’s story, though obviously fictional, is made up of many instances that have actually happened to real orcas. I have read extensively about these animals, and have observed them in both captivity situations and the wild. I have also written some supplemental chapters to the book as well, including a chapter about the history of orcas in captivity, some brief facts about orcas in the wild, and a section about whether or not captive orcas should be released into the wild. If this sounds like a book that you would like to read, please let me know. I await your reply.
Bascially, my storyline is this. The title is called "Silver: the Story of an Orca". It is about a young orca whale who gets captured by humans, goes through a variety of experiences while in captivity -- some good, some very horrific -- and then is later released into the ocean to find her family. Kind of a Free Willy thing, but is much more realistic and is not intended to be an anti-captivity novel. The focus is on the whale and how she endures some nightmarish situations without losing hope, until she can be reunited with her loved ones again.
Anyway, this is my query, what I've gotten so far. Please read and comment:
Do you enjoy reading good stories about animals, and in particular, whales and dolphins? If so, I would like to tell you about the new novel that I am proposing. My story, called Silver: The Story of an Orca, is told through the eyes of a spirited young orca whale, who begins her life with a close-knit family in the Pacific Northwest. Silver’s early days are carefree and happy, playing with her two young cousins, exploring the ocean world all around her, and basking in the love of her family members. One day, the family travels to a place called Salmon Cove -- a place where Silver’s life will soon change forever.
At first, Salmon Cove is a very delightful place, where Silver and her cousins find new playmates among the other families that are socializing there, and dining on all the delicious salmon that they can eat. But the next morning, humans -- strange creatures that Silver has seen before but has never had a reason to fear -- trap all the orcas in the cove with their nets and boats. The youngsters are snagged one by one, and separated from the adults -- and then eventually from each other.
Silver soon finds herself all alone, held captive in a sling on board a boat, heading to an unknown destination. Throughout the next few years, she will experience a variety of circumstances while under the care of man -- a place where she is well-treated by both her orca tank mates and the humans caring for her; a tank where an aggressive older female bullies and harasses her, and nearly kills her one day; a solitary existence in a dimly lit indoor warehouse pool; life in a tiny, too-warm pool in Mexico with an abusive owner, and only a cheerful bottlenose dolphin for company, and a nightmarish existence in Central America as part of a traveling circus. Silver’s health and her spirits fail her during this bleak time, and when she grows too sick and too weak to perform, her owner abandons her on a beach in the tropics.
But then, some kindly souls rescue her and nurse her back to health. When Silver recovers her strength, she soon realizes that she has a choice to make. Should she try to swim away and find her family, since she is now free to do that if she wishes? Or should she stay with the humans that she has now bonded with, and trusts completely, since she is terrified of trying to make it on her own in a vast, alien sea? Whatever she decides, it will change her life forever. . .
Silver’s story, though obviously fictional, is made up of many instances that have actually happened to real orcas. I have read extensively about these animals, and have observed them in both captivity situations and the wild. I have also written some supplemental chapters to the book as well, including a chapter about the history of orcas in captivity, some brief facts about orcas in the wild, and a section about whether or not captive orcas should be released into the wild. If this sounds like a book that you would like to read, please let me know. I await your reply.
