Paint What You Are: 104words

[Deleted]

Novel Excerpt:

"Nothing is pure in reality. No one knows it. Don’t draw a realistic woman. Draw your emotions about the woman. What color is your hair?”

I answered, “I think it’s auburn, sir.”

“Then everyone will see your auburn painting and think your emotions are as colorless and two-dimensional as your canvas. You are what you paint. Are you two-dimensional? You can breathe and laugh, can’t you?”

Mr. Greyson poked my stomach until I giggled.

“It tickles,” I shrieked.

“That laughter is burning mauve with impassioned youth and dim cobalt with hesitance.”

“I agree, sir.”

“Then, quite frankly little girl, your opinion doesn’t really matter.”

[joshuachrisstoff]

Sorry, I don't see it, I don't get it.
Is she naked and he is the art teacher trying to establish rules for the class on capturing essence?
It is a little short for me.
He is definitely an older man with some experience in art. She comes accross very young, "poked my stomach until I giggled.

“It tickles,” I shrieked."

That smacks of little girl, or immature 18 or 19 yo girl.
I was wondering if that had any bearing on matters.
perhaps a min 500 words might help me. perhaps a genre and age pitch would help to tell me why I am so out of my depth!

[churnthybutter]

Maidahl, I didn't know you were here too! (This is Ephemera of WB)

I agree you should lengthen it. I didn't quite understand if this was a naked model, and yeah she seems very immature.